Days 3 and 4.

Day 3:
Could have gone better. I am normally very impressed and appreciative of nurses, but I got one who made it difficult to be happy. I won't go into details because it will jut make me mad. Additionally, I don't want her behavior to paint a picture on the behalf of all of the nurses. On a positive note they were able to take the drain out of me, unhook my IV and I went on 4 walks around the surgical floor with the help of a walker.

In the afternoon we had a tornado warning so we were all moved from our rooms into the hallway.  Because of the amount of narcotic pain medications pumping through our veins, we probably had the most calm floor during the room evacuation.

Later during one of my mini-naps, I woke up to the smiling face of one of my new friends from Loras.  It was great to see her and she was great to go on a walk with.  Michael came later with pictures and videos of preschool graduation that I missed.  Another bonus was that I started to get up on my own to use the restroom.

Day 4 (today):

I got more sleep last night than the first two.  It was nice to no longer be tethered to any tubes.   I had a pretty hard time (still am) figuring out how to best manage my pain.  I realize that I can't be pain-free, but I am still having some difficulty with comfort.  I took 3walks today on the floor, ate lunch, and then prepared to be discharged.  It was nice to be in my own clothes.  We also got a couple of tools to help me with function and comfort at home, including a walker with wheels.   By 1:00 I was discharged and being loaded in to the car.

I am all set at home, got a comfy chair, the bed isn't  too punishing to get out of, and my walker maneuvers well in the house.

That's all for today.   Day 4 is a weird day because I've really come a long way in the past three days....but I have many, many days ahead of me...

End of Day 2

This post will be shorter. As it took3 mini-naps to fish the title. And another 4 to get this far.

• Moved from liquid diet to a soft diet.
• Took 4 short walks. 
• Greeted and chatted with faculty friends and family who took shifts while Michael was at work.
• Moving around...getting in and around the bed in particular is the worse.
• Catheter came out and my friend Sara became my good luck charm.  That's all I can say abou that....what happens at the hospital stays at the hospital...

Well, since this took me about an hour to complete I should sign off.

End of Day 1

This is the first time (I think ) I have blogged from my ipad. It's also the first time I have blogged while heavily medicated. It honestly took me 10 minutes to write that because I continually doze off. Perhaps it's best if I use bullets:

• Surgery went well.  It took about 4 hours. 
• I had little probes all over my body to continually assess my nerve function. The screws should not be pressing on any nerves.
• For anyone going to have a fusion, expect a wound drain, catheter, and strict bed rest on day 1.
• Also, if anesthesia makes you sick or other pain meds,  don't be afraid to ask for a motion sickness patch for behind your ears. It makes a world of difference.

Well, I took about 10 mini naps, no joke, to get this written, so I should just sign off.

Checking in tomorrow!!

Tomorrow we're checking into the hospital at 5 a.m.  I've been busy getting ready to go in--it seems like each time I've been in the hospital (4 babies and 2 back surgeries = 6 hospital stays, tomorrow makes lucky # 7...)  I tend to lose time.  I feel like I've entered another world where work, parenting, bills...all responsibilities feel distant to me.  So, I've tried to make sure I've paid some essential bills, left detailed notes for my mom and Michael about the schedule for the kids this week, submitted my final grades for the semester, and set my email to reply for "out of office". 

We also got a new piece of furniture in the house for recovery! My parents gifted me an awesome supportive chair that will help me have good posture with my back brace while having some sense of comfort.  It looks super cute in our living room and looks great with my couch (bonus).  I've been told that I will be spending the coming weeks--up to probably 3 months, primarily walking, sitting upright for no more than 20 minutes, or lying down.

For the last surgery I had a surge of "nesting" where I cleaned everything in site before I went into the hospital.  That didn't happen this time.  Probably because Michael has had to do so much over the course of the last 5 months that I don't feel as panicked, I know that he'll continue to pull through for me as he has been.  Plus it's really hard on my back when I bend and so basically the things that I can clean well are things that are at arm-reach level.  That is about 5% of what actually needs cleaned in the house it seems......Good thing I have four little people this summer that I can get to help me more.  I've got to let go of my own standard of cleanliness in order to let them help me....that's the hard part.  And I probably don't have that high of a standard compared to the norm....

Tonight I'll try to go to bed by 9. Michael and I will wake up at 4 and head out by 4:40.  I'm pretty sure I need to be fasting, I guess it'd be smart of me to figure out the time that's supposed to start....
I also have to do this whole-body wipe down with this sticky substance that tends to burn my sensitive skin.  It's worth it if it minimizes the chance for infection. 

To be honest I feel a weird sense of dread and doom about tomorrow.  Which I realize is ridiculous.  I do trust that I'm in God's care and hands, but I can't stop the little voice in the back of my head that wants me to be worried and a bit anxious about tomorrow's outcome. 

My parents are here to help and so that's awesome.  My dad is here until Wednesday and my mom is here until Sunday, at which point my mother-in-law will come for a few days and then my best friend from college for a few days.  I'm so glad that we have people in our lives willing to come and stay and support our family.  We're definitely surrounded by love. 

Well, that's all for now.  The next time I blog will have titanium in me.  I'm guessing these rods and screws will somehow give me super powers and I will most likely be a Marvel Superhero.  So, just be prepared for that. 

Starting this Blog....

I am, by nature, an information seeker.  When faced with a life-altering issue I tend to dive myself into the Google world and try to find any scrap of information that can help me understand the issue more.  When we were new parents to our second oldest who was born with a muscle and chromosome disorder, we were told by some service providers to not search the internet for information, it would just overwhelm us.  But I think the best advice we got was from our geneticist.  Upon delivering the news that he had narrowed down Noah's diagnosis, he told us to Google...to search for information.  He seemed to understand that in a world where we have no control over these big issues...that the comfort in controlling a keyboard for a small time was important to parents.  He did advise us to be cautious---to understand that when we Google his diagnosis to expect a laundry list...a cumulative list of every possible symptom or scenario and to realize that only a fraction of the ocean of information would actually apply to our child.  But by all means, we should educate ourselves.

I find myself back in that search mode again as I deal with an upcoming spinal fusion surgery (TLIF).  I'm googling, reading medical journal articles (fascinated that I am becoming a more savvy at understanding those articles), lurking on health boards, etc.  And again, I am faced with an ocean of information.  What seems to be the most helpful and encouraging are the blogs that help tell a more contextual story of the patient's recovery.  They tend to weave the good and the bad together to paint a more realistic, but hopeful, picture.  

There really aren't any blogs out there that I've been able to find with same demographic as me...particularly being young (yes, young :-) and female.  So, I've decided to start this blog, in the event that a few years down the road someone like me will be googling, looking for information, ideas, and comfort.  And maybe this blog can help just one person get through some of this rough stuff.  And perhaps for myself...maybe a year from now I can look back at this and think..."Hey, that was me...I did that!".  

So, I should start off with a brief introduction.

Who I am....

I am a 34-year old woman from the Mid-West.  I am a wife and mom of 4 young children, my oldest is 8 and my youngest is 3.  I am, indeed, overweight.  But my 5 year old told me just this morning that I am not a "Large Mommy", so I guess I have that going for me.  I want to be more active than I am but my chronic pain has truly been a barrier that I have not been able to overcome.  I am a professor at a small Liberal Arts College, which allows for a great balance of sitting, standing, and walking.  I am thankful that I am not in a job where I have to sit all day, I know my back could not handle it.  I am also thankful that my job has me on a 9-month contract for the year, making me available for both surgery and recovery this year. I am also a Christian who believes that even though crappy things happen to good people that I can use my story to help or encourage others, even in the most minor of ways.  I believe that my story is not my own, but also God's and that it is somehow significant or useful beyond the walls of my own home.  

Background of my Spine Health...

It's hard for me to remember how long it's been since I first started having issues....I think it really all began in August of 2010.  I sat most of the summer of 2010 studying for my preliminary exams, a requirement for the Ph.D. program I was in.  By the end of the summer, I could feel water dripping on my right foot as I was studying.  Much to my surprise, there was no water dripping.  That was the beginning of the nerve involvement.  Pain began a little later that fall, I had an x-ray done and found out that later on that the x-ray showed degenerative disc disease and spinal stenosis in my lowest two discs.  Not an uncommon finding in general, but it was uncommon given my age. Eventually that pain resolved.  

Fast forward to June of 2011.  I was as healthy and active as I had ever been.  I ran my first 5K with my college best friend.  A month later, I packed our house to prepare us for a move across town.  The very last thing I packed was our shower curtain.  I looped all of the rings together on a single ring.  As snapped the ring together to hold the bunch I felt and swore I heard a small rip in my lower back.  For some reason I just knew that I was done for.  

The following months were marked with a lot of physical therapy by an amazing physical therapist, steroid injections, and all kinds of anti-inflammatory and pain medications.  It just wasn't working.  The pain my right leg, as well as the numbness and tingling were too much.  I was not sleeping at night and the pain was unbearable.  That led me to my first disectomy surgery on 

L5-S1 in October of 2011.  

I was amazed with the initial results of the surgery.  No numbness, no tingling, no pre-surgery pain, just post-surgery discomfort and recovery.  Then something happened.  A turn for the worse.  Not sure what happened but I knew something was wrong.  A follow-up MRI done in January of 2012 showed what I fearful of---a re-herniation.  Through ibuprofen and gentle activity I was able to handle and cope with the pain, even make it through yet another move, until the following late-fall. And then it became unbearable again.  This time the symptoms include INSANE muscle-wrenching spasms in my right leg.  I quickly found myself having my 2nd disectomy on L5-S1 in January of 2013.  

Four weeks post surgery (Mid-February) I did it again while simply paper-punching some papers with a 3-hole punch.  It was clear that the degenerative disc disease and stenosis was dictating my spine health.  Weeks continued to pass and symptoms were worse and worse.  I am actually in worse shape now than I was prior to surgery #2.  

After another MRI, several visits to my surgeon, and a discogram to get a handle on what exactly is going on with my lower back, we've come to the point where the next answer to all of this is a spinal fusion of L4-L5 and L5-S1.  It's a TLIF.  I'll be going into the hospital in just a few days.  I will blog again before the surgery to talk more about how I've prepared and plan to blog in the following several weeks.

I hope that this blog can help at least one person as they Google for stories at 2 a.m.  I hope that I can bring a message that is both realistic and encouraging.